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| Ah... furniture privileges. I remember the first time my SO told me I wasn't allowed on the furniture any more and I cheekily asked if that included the whipping bench. How we laughed... or we would have done if I'd dared say it out loud. |
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| Elbow-length latex gloves should come with a safety warning, in my view. And latex gloves that cover the full length of the arm are just unsafe, no matter what the 'experts' might tell us about the length of the lower intestine. |
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| See all the little gold rings on their toes? Aren't they pretty? They've got lots more gold rings, for you to wear, so maybe you'll look just as pretty too. But they're not going on your toes, obviously. |
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| If it'll help, the soaking wet towel she is planning to ram down your throat will taste quite soapy. |
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| You might think that spousal abuse is neither funny nor sexy. My wife disagrees, though: she loves it, so who am I to argue? |